-or- It's all downhill from here
Years ago, when I first started contemplating going to medical school, I had a fear.
And that fear has successfully been overcome.
I was afraid of the first year of clinical work. Yep, downright afraid. And as I finished up my first year (all bookwork and basic science stuff here at Duke) and second year approached (the first year of clinical work, usually the third year of medical school at other schools) that fear became more real, more tangible. After all, I have a family, a wife and two wonderful daughters. And I had heard so many stories about never seeing them, never being able to do anything with them, never sleeping, etc. that I was nervous. Would we make it? Could we still stay close if I never saw my family?
We could and we did.
Second year is now over. I have waded through the trial and tribulation of long hours at the hospital, long nights of call, days in which I only saw my daughters while they were asleep, and days in which the most I was able to say to my wife was "Bye, love you, see you late this evening." But overall it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Sure, it was tough, but it was rewarding. Actually having my own patients who I was following, being the one the attending asked every day "How are they doing? What do you think we should do for them today?" is incredibly exciting. And actually putting to work all that book learning from last year was inspiring as well.
I am amazed at how much I learned. And I am excited to learn some more this next year doing research.