A silly little blog for me to drop the excrement of my mind.
-or- a simpler time
Published on September 27, 2004 By BlueDev In Philosophy
I like hot fudge. Quite a bit actually. While I'm not a chocolate freak, hot fudge really does something for me.

But nothing like what it does for my daughter. She's 5, she is in kindergarten, and she is amazing. I don't give her the credit she deserves often. But she really is. And there is a lot she can teach me. Like hot fudge.

Life isn't all roses when you are five. You have homework, have to put up with two busy parents, a little sister who is old enough to play with now, but also young enough to make it a bit difficult at times. Friends at school who are still trying to learn how to be social, with changing allegiances on a nearly daily basis present new problems. Balancing the demands of school, friends, and completely anal retentive parents, well, it can be tough some days.

That's where the hot fudge comes in. Serve some up, give her a smile and a hug, and watch the worries melt away.

Sure, the problems are still there. But so is the fudge. And the fudge trumps all. Her smile returns, as does the spring in her step. I should learn from that. Of course my life is more complicated than hers right now. But is that simply because I think it is? I have more responsibilities, more demands on my time, more people who rely on me directly, and what I am doing right now is not only going to affect my future, but hers as well. Yet can't I still find the absolute joy in something as simple as hot fudge? Can't I let that lift me the same way it lifts her? Has my need to live a more complex life forced me to find more complex solutions? Sometimes the answer must be yes.

Sometimes, though, I need to just sit back and enjoy the hot fudge. Just like Jessica.

Comments
on Sep 28, 2004
Gosh, hot fudge is delicious and that's really great your daughter loves it. I know what you mean though when you ask can't we enjoy something so simple to forget our own troubles. I think we can but we don't. Or we do but still think of our troubles. Life is so simple seen through a child's eyes. My two year old will be three next week and everytime I look at her it makes me think that she's so undemanding. All she wants is love and being taken care of. There are times when she goes off in a corner and plays by herself and there are times when she demands my time or her older siblings time. And you know what? Sometimes we don't give that to her freely. You know, we don't think about it because we are so wrapped up in our own world doing our own things and just taking a moment to entertain her is too taxing. So know what I did? I realized what was happening and I sat down and I talked to her and played some more with her and her toys. Then I gave her a hug and a kiss. While she slept I talked to her older sibs and I told them to make time for each other especially her. Now, I tell her more often I love her and I hug and kiss her a lot. I do that to all of them. Cause, regardless of all that is going on in my life, I shouldn't be too busy to show more affection and drop everything to play. Keep enjoying your hot fudge moments. One day she'll be too old to do that and at least you will have the memories.
on Sep 28, 2004

Has my need to live a more complex life forced me to find more complex solutions? Sometimes the answer must be yes.


Yes, to a point...but I still say that chocolate can make anything all better for a little while!

on Sep 28, 2004
All she wants is love and being taken care of.


Yep, Jessica is the same way. And it makes me sad that sometimes that is so hard to give. It shouldn't be. It should be basic, fundamental. That is one of the reasons Jess and I do our Daddy/Daughter dates. To make sure we have a chance to be together.

but I still say that chocolate can make anything all better for a little while!


Chocolate doesn't do that for me, but other things sure do. And I know some days I just need to go pick up some chocolate for the girls!
on Sep 29, 2004
this is a great story, bluedev. i really enjoyed it. you and your daughter sound like quite a team

mig XX